Category: becoming a better me

Seasonal Affective Disorder (aka winter blues or winter depression) is a mood disorder in which people who normally enjoy good mental health experience mild to severe depression. In the winter.

Symptoms include a persistent low mood, decreased interest in work and sociability, feelings of isolation, increased anxiety, susceptibility to stress, increased television watching, over eating – especially of high carb foods, which often brings about lack of energy, weight gain, lack of physical exercise, feeling sluggish, over sleeping, and in general just being “SAD”. Believed to be related to light, or the lack of it, causal theories include a low production of the light producing chemical serotonin, and an over production of the dark producing hormone melatonin. People in northern climates are more likely to experience winter blues than people in areas where winters are not as cold, dark or long. Duh. Poor eating habits and resulting poor nutrition in winter months, particularly a reduced amount of fruits and vegetables is also related to symptoms of SAD. Common treatments include light therapy – which consists of the patient sitting beside a full spectrum light, increase in vitamin D levels, nutritional supplements, physical exercise, medication and counseling.

Okay, I’m not trying to pretend to be an expert on SAD, but like many people who live in areas with long months of dark and cold, I experience winter blues from time to time too. And in almost all cases, I could acknowledge a combination of any of the following as contributors: lack of light, extended stretches of extreme cold, going outside less, lack of exercise, minimal fruits and vegetables, lack of sociability and a lack of meaningful projects to occupy my time and mind. I believe that most people in the north experience some level of SAD during the winter months. And it has been my observation that even the worst cases are completely treatable, (if not altogether preventable) with a little extra care and attention given to the basics.

I think we would readily agree that bright, sunny summer days are uplifting to our spirits. It is easier to want to be outside, go for walks and eat better when the world is rosy. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that we would feel the opposite in the absence of those bright sunny days. While there is nothing we can do to lengthen the days or make the sun warmer, there are many things we can do to take charge of our own mental health.

TAKE CONTROL

You know yourself. You can anticipate from prior experience, the areas in which you will struggle as winter approaches. Be proactive. Learn to circumvent your depressive spells with strategy. In short – outwit SAD.

1. LET THE SUN SHINE IN

Winter isn’t completely dark. Take advantage of whatever natural light you have. When the sun is shining, take a few minutes to stand in the window and look outside. Enjoy the beauty of a lovely winter day that you may normally not take note of. Open the blinds. Greet the start of each new day by spending some time looking outside. Invite the sun into the house. Consider getting yourself a full spectrum light to read by. Many people find additional lighting helpful.

2. Bringing GREEN indoors

Get yourself some nice green plants to set in your sunniest spots. Take good care of them. Nurture them along. Their health and wellness can mirror your own. Aside from their visual appeal, plants have benefits that far exceed the aesthetic. When you add indoor plants you’re not just adding greenery. They literally interact with your body, mind and home in ways that enhances your quality of life. Being close to greenery makes us feel more at ease and we experience less stress. Whether in the home, office or in public buildings, plants have the effect of making our environment seem quieter and more relaxed. Research indicates repeatedly that interior plants have dramatic effects on our well being. But they’re not magic. Investing in their care is part of the process. It literally reconnects us with nature. Because plants have large surface areas and exchange gases and water with their surroundings, they reduce carbon dioxide levels, increase humidity in the air, and reduce the level of other certain air pollutants and airborne dust levels.

Not really a plant person? Spider plants and philodendrons are great starter plants as they thrive in even minimal light and are very forgiving. They can become your new best friends and make you feel like you have a real green thumb simply because they’ll thrive on minimal attention, but responding to their care is part of the process, so don’t neglect them. Pay attention to them and learn to read their signs. You’ll see when they need water because they’ll look thirsty. But don’t over water them. The soil should not feel ‘wet’ between waterings. Make sure the water can drain easily.

3. NUTRITION  

This is huge. And we have so many more advantages today than what we had even one generation ago. When I was a child, our winter vegetables were still canned – ugh. Canned peas, canned beans, canned corn, even canned spinach. I know right! I shudder to even remember canned spinach. Can you spell s-l-i-m-e-y?
By the time I was a teenager though, we began to see frozen vegetables in the grocery stores – which tasted better, and were more nutritious (not that we knew much about that). And now here we are – so many fruits and vegetables available throughout the winter. Variety our parents never saw, and our grandparents couldn’t even imagine – no matter what the season.

I don’t want to rain on this wonderful parade, but admit it, in the winter, most of this wonderful variety is coming from very far away, which means extended time from field to fork. It is a documented fact that nutrients start to diminish within an hour after harvest, so minimizing that time is vitally important to ensure the highest quality. For that reason it is still important that we focus on eating SEASONALLY. (I mean eating IN-THE-SEASON). For instance when we buy ‘fresh‘ broccoli in February in Edmonton, Alberta Canada – commonly it was picked two to three weeks before we see it on the grocery store shelf. And then we take it home and put it into our fridge for another week. Or more. I know right? But admit it. And much of the produce we eat had to be picked green (unripe) to get it to us before spoiling. Understanding that many nutrients develop in the last stages of ripening ON the plant, and that they begin to deplete within the HOUR after harvest, our nutritional expectations of so called ‘fresh’ produce in the winter time are unrealistically high. EVERY effort should be made to buy the MOST nutritious fruits and vegetables possible. And for the record, we’re not talking about organic or not-organic here. Organic still has to travel thousands of miles in the winter to make it to our plates, and so is still susceptible to the same nutrient depletion associated with that travel.

Freeze dried fruits and vegetables are without question, the most nutritious on the market today. With the exception of what we grow in our own backyard organic gardens, or possibly buy in a farmer’s market, nothing we can buy is going to be ‘fresher’. Why? Because they are flash frozen within hours of harvest – that’s why. While I cannot speak about all brands (and there are many brands), I can speak to a particular brand, the North American industry leader of freeze dried food: THRIVE LIFE. THRIVE Life fruits and vegetables are ripened ON the plants (unlike most produce we buy in the grocery store). This gives them the very best possible start. In ripening on the plant, the phytonutrients that nature intended are fully developed and INTACT. That is a huge advantage over produce that is picked unripe. Picked ripe, Thrive Life foods are flash frozen within hours of harvest, 2 – 6 hours. That in itself is amazing. But it gets even better. The process of flash freezing locks in the natural goodness including flavour, colour, texture AND nutrients. In this frozen state, the produce is transferred to a facility where it has all the remaining moisture removed through a vacuum like process called sublimation. The result? The most nutritional food on the planet.

Truly freeze drying is the answer to the food problems in most of the world. And for those of us who live with seasonal gardens, we can eat the best and most nutritious food twelve months a year! Literally, it is eating “in-the-season” all year long. Not simply because it is so readily available, but because the process of freeze drying is the most shelf-stable way of preserving food, AND the most nutrient dense. The shelf life of a sealed can of most freeze dried foods is 25+ years. Does it get any better than that?

So what does all this mean to us? It means that we can eat BROCCOLI (AND cauliflower AND zucchini AND spinach AND kale AND asparagus AND green beans AND red peppers AND peaches AND pineapple AND mangoes AND blueberries AND so many more fruits and vegetables in the middle of winter that are as nutritious as they were on the day they were picked ripe – every! single! day! of the year! Even in November, December, January, February, March and April. That means we can Eat better than we have ever been able to do before.

4. EXERCISE

Getting exercise in the middle of winter requires intent. It is not as easy as it was on sunny days to walk around the block. Frankly, it almost doesn’t matter what you choose to do – any and all exercise is going to benefit you. Whether you decide to go to a gym, do a daily routine along with a video, walk on the treadmill or any other choice, is not as important as simply DOING something. Make a point to set aside at least 30 minutes a day to involve yourself in intentional exercise. Doing it in five minute increments, or all at once – again, fit it in the best way you can. Try to increase your time and endurance as you gain stamina.

Set goals. Write them down. Track your exercise. It is a known and well accepted fact that daily physical activity overcomes fatigue and depression. The details are up to you.

5. GET OUTSIDE

When you can, go outside. Go for a walk. Shovel the driveway and sidewalks (good exercise too). Shovel your neighbours out. Go tobogganing. Skate. Ski – either cross country or downhill. Walk in the country or city parks. Feed the birds. Did you know that chickadees will come and eat right out of your hand!

Feed the birds in your own yard. Attracting them to a tree outside your window will provide enjoyment all winter long. Not only are you doing a good thing for them in the coldest months of the year, but you welcome their cheery chattering on the bright sunny days of winter. It is a wonderful way to bring the joy of outside – indoors.

6. BE SOCIALABLE and BELONG

Invite friends for dinner once a week. Force yourself at first if you have to. It will give you a reason to clean the house, put a smile on your face and cook a nice meal. Make social plans and don’t let yourself talk YOU out of it. Good conversation around a dinner table or around a game of cards makes you happy. Hosting is therapy and going out is good therapy too. Be a friend. Reach out. Think of others who might need a lift. Embrace others. Help others. Serve others. We are not meant to be alone. There is so much good we can do in this world.

Whether to a neighbourhood, a church congregation, a community league, a group of friends, a work place, or any other organization, we can each find an opportunity to contribute meaningfully to someone else. The social ties that accompany a sense of ‘belonging’ help us manage stress and other issues. When we support, and feel the support of others – we are not alone, we are more resilient and we can often cope more effectively with difficult times in our lives.

When we sold the store, it left a big void in my life. An empty spot. As much as I relished being home more, and being more involved with my grandchildren, the store had been a very social place for me. I had also served on a Board of Directors in our industry for over ten years. Within a niche market like store, people found quite an intimate gathering place, and I had come to love many of those people. Some had come to be dear friends: employees, customers, even vendors, artists, other independent store colleagues, and colleagues on the board. Because most of of my customers came from all over northern Alberta, our store was the meeting place, it was our common ground. When the store was gone, I knew that no matter how much I cared, I would never see most of those people again, and that was a lonely realization, the source of significant loss for me, even a degree of grief. Rather than continue to feel that emptiness, I decided to reach out to some of those former customers, and invite them for lunch. So began a few months of sharing meals and renewing friendships that was helpful for me.

For a few years prior to selling our store, I had monthly met with a handful of friends for lunch at each other’s homes. We would chat and catch up, and we found joy in each other’s company. We’ve continued our friendship through these many years, which has been important to me. Stupid Covid threw a monkey wrench into our gatherings for awhile, but we all look forward to reconvening when we can, and I have no doubt it will seem as if we’ve never been apart.

Similarly, Dan and I regularly get together with a group of friends on Monday evenings to have wholesome discussions and learn from one another. We’ve done this for several years, and have developed close friendships within this group. Covid tried to mess with that too, but we found a way around it with zoom. We look forward to meeting again in person like we used to.

The need to affiliate with and be accepted by members of a group is real. As a child we had the need to belong to a peer group at school, or sports team or something similar. And as adult we still have the need to be accepted by co-workers, to be part of an athletic team, social group, club or a religious group. The sense of belonging involves more than gaining acceptance FROM others, it also requires providing that same acceptance TO others. It can lead to changes in behaviours, beliefs and perspectives as we find ourselves influenced by and conforming to the standards of the group. This can be positive, or not so positive, so select the kind of group we want to belong to with care.

7. TURN OFF THE TV and find a meaningful PROJECT

Give yourself a winter project to work on during the coldest days, the days when hours seem to stretch on. A new hobby. Painting, woodworking, knitting, writing, reading, cooking, baking, sewing, weaving, planning your garden, personal study, take a class, complete a home renovation project . . . . Having meaningful projects is excellent use of the slow hours that come with winter. It provides purpose for the hours that you’re tempted to spend in front of the television. Wasting those winter hours in front of the tube gives us more to regret, and no sense of accomplishment. Using those same hours to complete a project, or many projects gives you something to smile about. Something to celebrate. And feelings of celebration over a job well done cannot coexist with sadness.

8. GIVE YOURSELF SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO

It doesn’t have to be a winter vacation, but find something that you can plan and look forward to.

Gardening: Could be you’re looking forward to your garden. Do you plant a garden in the spring? If so, its time to start looking at what you’re gonna plant, and those improvements you thought of last summer. By the end of January, I’ve often purchased my seeds for the upcoming year. If you don’t have the space for a garden, consider renting a spot in one of the many community gardens that are springing up in urban areas.

Take a Class:
Find a hobby or develop a skill. There are lots of classes, both on the community level and online, for beginners and experienced people alike. Check out your local Community league, social media groups, or your local greenhouses for their calendars.

a Getaway Vacation:
There was a time I couldn’t even imagine the luxury of getting away in the winter. It took my husband quite a while to sell me on the idea. But once we sprung for that first one in January, it opened up a whole new world for us. Something to look forward to. Something to plan for. I learned to plan our getaway for later in the year. Going away in November only gave me four more months of winter with nothing to look forward to. An escape in November soon becomes only a memory for me. Going away in January was nice, but still – we came back to February (arguably the longest month of the year), and March which can be long and dreary, notwithstanding a little more ‘light’. I found that planning a trip for the end of February or the beginning of March – spread out the joy. It gave me something to look forward to all November, December, January and even February. A literal light at the end of my tunnel. It was empowering.

For many years, I managed our family’s business – a bookstore. I loved the bookstore, thoroughly enjoyed the environment and the people I dealt with – some of the best on this planet. I loved the product I was able to bring into their lives (and to our own as well). I found the work meaningful, and felt that I had lots of opportunity to lighten loads and brighten days – my own, as well as those of others. But it was a lot of work! And sometimes my days were long. And other things in my life got set aside for a season. And I missed important events, and time with my family. And there was related stress. Things didn’t always go smoothly. Bills were unrelenting. Christmas took on new meaning.

Our 4th quarter of the year was our most important and a more successful 4th quarter, meant we could pay our bills easier for quite some time the following year. Preparing for Christmas began in April, when I began ordering Nativities and other novelty items I liked to carry. By June I was pre-ordering books that wouldn’t be published till fall. In the summer I was attending trade shows and an annual convention in Utah, getting ready for 4th quarter sales. My biggest order of the year was September, followed by October. In November we were decorating for Christmas and making the best of every advantage we had. Heaven forbid if I got sick somewhere in there, or had a family wedding, or personal tragedy. And I still had a large family at home who needed a fulltime mom, and a husband, and a calling at church, and other responsibilities. And there was always the stupid Canadian dollar – fluctuating up and down (95% of our products came from the US), and the rising cost of transportation, and occasional bad roads in winter that interfered with us picking up product on time, and although I had wonderful customers, some of whom are still dear friends to this day, not all customers are nice. Some are grumps and nothing you do will ever make them happy, and I took all their criticism and grumpiness personally, and sometimes, it was defeating, and difficult to bear. . . . . and on and on and on. . . . Sometimes in the early fall, I would worry about the next few months to come, and stress about how I was going to ‘do it all again’, and keep the smile on, and be cheerful at work, and pay the bills, and “what if this big product investment I just made doesn’t pay off?” Knowing I was headed for long hours, with uncertain outcome, I would start to sink under the weight of it all. I worried if I could keep it up till Christmas was over, and even if I did, I still had to get through January and February and March – which were so long, and cold and dreary, and business was slow. And all that didn’t even touch issues on the home front: being a mom, and a new gramma, and of course a wife, and a friend, and a good neighbour, and . . . and . . . and.

I had learned in my young adult life that despair was real and that it could be debilitating. And I knew that I was not immune to it. I also knew that it could control me, if I didn’t control it first. I knew I needed something to look forward to. a literal light that I could stretch toward. It became an annual trip for Dan and I. I planned it deliberately for the last week of February and the first week of March. That way, when we came back, no matter what March had to throw at me, my attitude was one of empowerment. “Go ahead! Snow! Blizzard! Be cold! Give it your best shot Winter! Your days are numbered now, and we both know you’re on your way out. There is NOTHING you can do to change the calendar!” Literally, I could say those words with a smile because they were true. And what it did for me in September and October – was give me that light, that vision of warm sunny beaches to look forward to. I could say to myself “I can do this. I am in control. At the end of this, I’m going to Mexico, and when I get there, I’m gonna do a whole lotta nothing.” It didn’t matter what got thrown my way I would think “this is okay, because I’m going to Mexico in February / Who cares about …. ? I’m going to Mexico in February.” For me, it was therapy. And not just the trip itself, almost more than the trip, was the anticipation OF the trip.

Do not underestimate the Value of ANTICIPATION.
Anticipating, can also be “savouring”. It can lighten burdens. It can initiate positive decision making. Anticipating a vacation can be as therapeutic as the vacation itself. Anticipating implies making plans and using one’s imagine. And it doesn’t have to be a winter vacation. Looking forward to going camping in the summer – looking forward to a concert in the spring – looking forward to a family reunion later in the year – looking forward to an upcoming family wedding, or a birth – looking forward to a homecoming – looking forward to graduation or any other significant life change . . . The point is to give yourself something to look forward to.

9. Read Good books:

Don’t discount the value of getting lost in a good book. A good book has the power to transport you to another place. It can literally be a vacation-of-the-mind. A good book can contain information about values, morals, and important life principles. Good books give us positive value, and bad books give us negative value.

Be careful about choosing books. There are millions of books in the world, and thousands of them are GOOD. Some of them are even GREAT. I am an avid reader, but I realized long ago that I couldn’t possibly read all the good books this world has to offer me. I am also a slow reader. It takes me twice as long as it takes Dan to read the same book. I read, and then I savour, and sometimes I go back and read that passage again. Sometimes if it was particularly moving, I bask in it for awhile, possibly even marking it for reference later. No wonder it takes me so long to read.

Like you perhaps, I find myself emotionally influenced by what I read. I can be discouraged and depressed or encouraged and uplifted. I can find joy in the resilience of the human spirit and the goodness of humanity. I can be drug down by the evil that exists in the world. Sometimes I can spend hours in a book and when I come to the end, think “what a stupid waste of time that was”. And I resent wasted time; I only have so many hours in my day. I have to protect my mental health and poor choices of where I spend my time can put me in a dark place.

So how to choose where I will devote my reading hours? I set up a single piece of criteria for the books I read. It is this: If at the end, I feel like I am a better person then it was worth it to me. Do I feel lighter? Do I feel closer to my Saviour? Do I feel courage to go forward and do good? Do I feel like I learned something worthwhile? Do I feel like I want to be a better friend, better mom, better wife, better . . . (you fill in the blank)? Do I feel happy? Did it make me smile? Did it make me chuckle or even laugh out loud? I am not saying I don’t read escape novels or even what I call FLUFF novels. Sometimes a good fluff novel is the best escape ever. And I’m not saying my choices are always great literature. But, in the end, if I feel like I am a better person for having read those pages, then it was worth it to me. Taking recommendations from friends is an excellent place to start when looking for a book to invest your precious time in.

10. SERVICE: Volunteer, and lose yourself in the needs of something outside of yourself

Two years ago, I considered the fact that pretty much all my friends, most of my social contacts outside of my own family and neighbours, were members of my own church. Not just my congregation, through my contacts at the bookstore, I had friends all over. But again, most of those were members of my church. I’m not complaining. They are some of the best people who walk the earth. But I felt that I was lacking. Because of my decades in the store, I didn’t have time to seek friends in other places. But we had sold the store in 2015, and I realized that I still had yet to expand contacts outside of my existing friends within the church.

I felt like with the store gone, I should be able to afford to spend some time outside of my usual sphere, and meet new people with whom I might have something in common. At length I decided community service was a good place to start. But it was the spring of 2020, and Covid was dominating everything. I reached out to our community league and emailed “I’d like to offer my time to our community league. I don’t know what you’re even able to do these days, but whatever it is, sign me up to volunteer with it. Just let me know where and when.” Almost as a surprise, I heard back from someone – her name is Karen. I began by volunteering at a customized Covid-style celebration of Canada Day. I was nervous and shy, and masked of course. I was the ‘new kid on the block’ among strangers. I was completely out of my comfort zone. But I was happy to have assisted.

I attended my first Community League meeting later that summer, all of us socially distanced and masked Covid style. Awkward. l listened to a stranger pitch her idea of a community garden, which was well received by the executive and others in attendance. If you know me, you know I ‘garden’. This, I felt was something I could help with. At the end of the meeting, I followed this lady out and told her I would help her in any way I could. We exchanged contact information, and so began a lovely friendship as we toured other community gardens in the city. Since then, we’ve worked together on several garden related projects and I support her happily, as her vision gradually became tangible with garden plots and real people sowing, nurturing and reaping. Her name is Myrna bytheway. Through my work in the garden, I’ve met others who I consider friends now. All people I never would have met without my service in our community.

I work a volunteer shift weekly at the Edmonton Temple for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I cannot express the joy I find in working that shift, and the beautiful people with whom I interact regularly. Many former customers of mine, who I thought I might never see again in this world, cross my path inside those doors and I love reconnecting with them.

Reach Out. Be brave. There are people like you out there who also seek meaningful relationships

I work part time as a Consultant for Thrive Life freeze dried foods, and I have come to know some fabulous people through my association with this great company. The company and products that I sell are completely in line with my personal values, so the people I work with: customers, other consultants like myself, as well as in the corporate office, all share those same core values. What a joy to find so many people I have important things in common with. Meaningful and sometimes lifelong friendships develop within this kind of association. This is not a winter thing, its a life hack.

In the end, what you are trying to do, is outwit SAD with avoidance strategies. Seasonal Affective Disorder is not a living breathing organic entity. You are! Don’t give it power over you. Imagine yourself in the ring with it. You are a child of God. Your nature is divine. You have agency and are in control of your choices. ‘It’ is none of those things. Unlike other kinds of depression, SAD can be summed up as a choice. Choose to be stronger than it. Choose to be in control. Choose to use your winter months to accomplish something meaningful and to regain control of your health and wellness.

I used to always tell my kids “be smarter than [the problem]”. I would sometimes lightheartedly add “It’s you and [the problem]. One of you has a high school diploma. See if you can figure this out.” Occasionally with SAD, I’ve had to take my own advice. “Be smarter than SAD. One of us has a high school diploma. I can figure this out.”

I can outwit SAD. And so can you.

I’d love to hear your strategies in outwitting SAD in the winter time. What do you do? What are you planning to do?

Warmly,

Cindy Suelzle