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Common Herbs and Spices in Your House and Yard: Oregano

Oregano is a major player in my herb garden. To the right you can see a few varieties of thyme. Behind the thyme are feverfew plants in full bloom, St. John’s wort behind the feverfew with yellow flowers. Also purple lupins and poppies in bloom.
Raspberries in the very back along the fence.

Oregano is a staple in every herb garden. Primarily because it is so doggone easy to grow, and easy to please. It is super friendly and loves everything and everyone; a real confidence booster for first time gardeners.
* Spring came early this year? Great! Oregano will be one of your first plants to green up.
* Late spring? Don’t worry about it. Oregano will be pushing through the cold nights like a trooper.
* Lots of rain and hardly any sun? No problem. Oregano can be its own mini rain forest.
* Lots of sun and a little on the dry side? Gotcha covered. Oregano is very forgiving on either end of the spectrum. For a plant that originates in the hot areas of the Mediterranean, it is surprising how hearty an established plant can be in a typical Canadian year.

in the garden

Oregano is a hearty perennial that makes a useful ground cover in any sunny part of your garden. It may start out low, but can grow up to two feet high when mature! It has a lovely pink to lavender coloured flower (some varieties might have white flowers) so I make sure to have it in a few different spots: my herb garden of course where I keep it trimmed by harvesting, and in a couple of my flower gardens where I allow it to flower to use in bouquets and flower arrangements. Strip off the lower leaves to use fresh or dry and then enjoy the flowers in a jar of water. Because its so independent (not one of those high maintenance fair weather friends), oregano is the perfect beginner for any herb or backyard garden. If you’re much north of Edmonton, or live out in the country where your garden is open, its possible your oregano might not make it through every winter. Just be prepared for this and don’t take it personally. That’s one reason I keep it in a few DIFFERENT spots throughout my garden. I don’t want to put all my eggs in one basket, and we do live in Canada after all. I even grow some in my vegetable garden as it is a friendly and helpful companion to many other plants.

Oregano in upper right, parsley in center and sage forefront. Lupin (purple flower) upper left of center, feverfew upper far left (flowering like little white daisies). Red orache center left.

Most herbs are considered weeds (we are such name calling bigots lol), and as such they’re not particularly fussy about the soil in which they grow. Oregano is no exception. Not surprisingly then, rich loamy soil is actually not even desirable for oregano. It actually prefers sandier, lighter soil that drains well. So if you have a difficult spot in a sunny area (rock garden, along a sidewalk, or close to your kids’ sandbox) – let your oregano show you what its made of. If you’re in an apartment with a sunny side, or small condo with limited patio space, oregano will do well in a pot. If you live where I live, be prepared. A pot makes it a one season plant as it won’t survive the winter outside of the ground. Best to plant it in the ground if you have a spot available, so that it can come back, but if you don’t – no problem. Just treat it like an annual and replant it again next year. It does best in sun of course but doesn’t demand full sun. Other than that it is virtually trouble free and maintenance free. Having said all this, my garden has excellent soil and I really don’t have a poor-soil place to plant it, so it is where it is. Thankfully its pretty difficult to offend oregano.

The leaves of oregano are flat and oval and can range from fuzzy to almost smooth. Occasionally mistaken for marjoram as they belong to the same family and look very much alike. 

Oregano plants are in the mint family (and a close cousin of marjoram) so they propagate themselves through root expansion. They’re not ‘invasive‘, but they will spread if not contained. I like this fact and it keeps my oregano plentiful so that I have lots to move around and to share.

It can be started from seeds but they take a long time to germinate. Catalogs offer a wide variety of seeds, but unless you’ve got your heart set on a particular type that you can only get by seed, spend a few bucks and get a plant from your local nursery. Better yet, get a cutting or division from a friend, then you’ll know exactly what to expect and you’re more sure of its hardiness. After a few years, you can divide your own plants to spread oregano to different parts of your garden, and share with friends.

Few garden pests bother oregano, (another great attribute), in fact the strong scent of oregano repels pests, making it an excellent companion plant in your vegetable or flower garden or under fruit trees.

Many use oregano oil as a natural insect repellent, and even as bug spray for your household plants! Simply add a few drops to a spray bottle with water, and spray your plants with it. You will keep aphids away.

in the kitchen

Oregano is a MUST-HAVE in any kitchen garden, probably the herb I use the most during the cold months, as it is so wonderful in soups, meat stews, pasta sauces, chicken dishes, dressings, and roasted vegetable dishes (especially those with a Mediterranean flavour. One of my favourite ways to use it in the summer months is with a few other herbs on vegetables roasted over the barbeque with a little bit of olive oil. Did you know that climate, soil, and moisture can cause variation in the flavour? That means that your oregano can be quite unique to YOU.

As with most herbs, oregano leaves taste best before the plant flowers. In my herb garden I pinch the flowers to keep the plants bushy and prevent it from bolting to seed. In my flower garden, I allow them to flower and then cut to use in the house in flower arrangements. Either way, cutting the flower off keeps the plant vibrant.

To harvest (anytime after the plants are close to 6 inches), simply clip with some kitchen scissors or clippers. I cut the stem right to the ground to encourage more stems from the base and keep the plant looking plump. I pick the bigger, older stems that are a little more ‘woody’. Swish lightly in clean water to wash and shake excess water off in the sink. Let sit to let the wetness dry off, and when no longer damp, strip the leaves from the top by holding the top and sliding your finger the thumb down the stem.

Oregano and Thyme. Very good friends.

Conveniently, harvesting = pruning. Most woody, perennial herbs don’t require pruning to grow. They’re fine left to their own devices and given the right growing conditions, in fact many will become shrubs or carpets of ground cover. But in a well kept garden, pruning will improve the look and strength of the plants, and the whole idea in a home garden is to USE the herbs anyway right? Pruning also encourages new growth which will have the best flavour. Having said this, the flowers of the oregano plant attract bees and other friendly pollinators which is very desirable in any garden, so allowing some flowers to stay on the plant is a good thing. There simply is no bad way to grow oregano. It is going to like you and help you no matter what you do or don’t do regarding it. Wouldn’t we all like to have friends this loyal and forgiving?

Using it fresh in salads, and many other dishes, using it dry during the winter, and even making into a tea – which is quite tasty bytheway. I sometimes use it in my pesto to supplement basil if I’m a little low on basil. When you know something is super nutritious as well as delicious, your incentive to use them MORE is enhanced.

However you use it, just make sure you do!

oregano is good for you

More than just a culinary herb to use in the kitchen, oregano is rich in antioxidants, boasting one of the biggest antioxidant ratings. Keep in mind of course that we don’t eat handfuls of oregano like we eat handfuls of berries, but just knowing that should make us want to include them as much as possible in our diet. Rich in Vitamin K, (a lesser known but important nutrient), it is helpful in preventing heart disease and building strong bones.

a veritable bouquet of herbs! Clockwise from 11:00 and 12:00 is Feverfew in full flower,
1:00 is Red Orache (more green than red here),
3:00 is Orache, 4:00, 5:00 and 7:00 is Mint, 6:00 is Feverfew and dead center is Oregano

Oregano is well known to strengthen our immune system, so make sure you have plenty on hand for flu and cold season. Because it has powerful antibacterial and anti-fungal properties oregano oil is very popular. It has a remarkable ability to fight bacteria and studies indicate that it’s antimicrobial quality is not diminished by heating. For those who suffer from arthritis and other inflammatory conditions, it is helpful to know that oregano contains a substance known as beta-caryophyllin, which inhibits inflammation, so we can add anti-inflammatory to the list of favourite ‘antis“.

Oregano has earned its honoured place in my garden, and I love that the flowers attract bees which are welcome guests. I highly recommend it in your herb, flower, or vegetable garden.  A single plant can yield you enough to use fresh during the summer and enough to dry for the rest of the year.

I’d love to hear your Oregano story. 
How do you grow it and where? 
What are your favourite ways to use it? 
Any tips for the rest of us?

Warmly,

Cindy Suelzle

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One step at a time. One project at a time.

Every year since we bought our first house in our early married years (a real honest to goodness fixer upper), we’ve kept to a plan of home improvements as we could afford them. Limiting ourselves to two projects a year, helped motivate us without overwhelming us. It also kept it affordable. Over the years, we’ve stuck to it in every house we lived – even when it was a low income rental when Dan went back to school. It kept us thinking, planning, and making things better for ourselves, while keeping projects in perspective and manageable, All these many years later, we still follow the same formula. One inside project. One outside project.

Some have been big projects – like 2015’s kitchen, and the 2021 greenhouse.  
Some have been smaller projects – like planting a tree, painting a wall, replacing a fixture or a single window or laying some reclaimed brick in the garden paths. The outside project is in the warm months, the inside project is reserved for the cold months. No one wants to waste beautiful summer days working in the house.

hard to see the glass brick patio in this little bistro area off the kitchen door, but this is where it is. To the right, you can catch a glimpse of a 45 gallon rain barrel hooked up to the rainspout

One year we scored some glass bricks from a friend’s reno project. I was so happy! Dan – not so happy. They sat around for a year or two, Dan trying to talk me into getting rid of them, (hoping they’d break so I’d have to) and me just ‘knowing‘ they had a higher purpose in my life. LOL.

In 2002 a big bush winter killed and had to be removed. Just outside the kitchen door, which was very provident! I had the boys chop it down and dig the roots out. We could have planted another tree, but I had visions of a little bistro-type area. Zack and Joseph were willing to make my vision come to life. Dan was not convinced it would work, and didn’t like the idea of the glass bricks being a floor, so he kept his distance from what he was sure was a doomed project. The boys created a base out of sand from the sandbox, and laid the glass bricks as if they were ‘bricks’. Truth be told, I only expected those bricks to last a year or two. None of us were very hopeful about what the winter might do to them, but we had nothing to lose by trying, and everything to gain.  So we did it anyway.

These pictures were taken 14 years later. We’ve had to replace a brick or two from time to time, but not more than 6 or 8 in total. They’ve sunk a little bit, owing to our amateur job of packing the base layer in. But they’re still wonderful, and I still love the spot on our east side, just outside the kitchen door. The perfect spot for a summer breakfast, or a dinner in the shade.  In the picture above you can see the strings from the hammock (on the left) strung from this tree to the one next to it.

In 2016, our inside project was a big one that took 10 times longer than we anticipated. We created a bathroom downstairs adjoining a room that we call “Gramma’s room” for my mom. This was the first big project in preparation for my mother coming to live with us, hence the name “Gramma’s room“. We used to call it Uncle Luke’s room, but things have changed. It was a very big deal. The first project quite so all inclusively complicated. When it was done, we considered having a “Bathroom Done Party” to celebrate. If you came to visit in the months after it was finished, we probably invited you to come see it. LOL. We rejoiced for months and I found myself going down to look at it several times a day for the first few weeks.

We had started the bathroom in January and finished the end of June. When I use the word “WE”, I am of course referring to the “royal WE”. Meaning Dan, although I do the clean up when things get done. There were lots of domino projects that had to get done simultaneously to make it possible. It was a big project that impacted every room downstairs before it was done, and our grandchildren couldn’t play downstairs for so long, they forgot we had a downstairs.

The adjoining bedroom “Gramma’d bedroom” would be the next year’s inside project, but that was a subject we avoided discussing for a very long time. Not surprisingly, the outside project that year was a small one. It was tempting to not do anything that year, but we had made the decision long ago, and that meant we would make one improvement a year outside and one inside. And sticking to it was important.

We painted the fence panel behind our bistro area in the backyard. I know. Big deal. It only took me one day. (We needed easy because the bathroom sucked all our energy.) But easy doesn’t mean ‘do nothing‘. It is important to be flexible with our energy and our expenses, and to not bite off more than we can chew, or afford. Some jobs are big and some are just small. But each one moves us forward, and brings with it a sense of accomplishment. It is just as important to stick to the plan, and move forward. Progress means forward. One step at a time.

Do you have a plan for fixing things up in your little world? I’d love to hear it.


Warmly,

Cindy Suelzle

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CHIVES your garden’s best neighbour

CHIVES are one of the first plants in your garden to come up – even before the garden has dried out, and well before the cold is over, their bright, cheery green spears say “spring is around the corner” – the words I wait months to hear.  They are the easiest herb to grow and are a valuable addition to every summer kitchen.  They are low maintenance and high yield – my favourite combination. 

No matter how much of a novice gardener you might be, CHIVES make every gardener look good.  They are nature’s confidence builder.  Simple to grow, drought and cold resistant, will tolerate too much rain, they thrive on neglect, and are very forgiving.  They love sun, but will tolerate partial shade like the good sports they are.  As perennials they grow back every spring.  When other plants let you down, you can always count on CHIVES. 

CHIVES have a light onion flavour, and their brilliant green hollow, grass-like leaves are are the perfect addition to salads, soups, sandwiches, baked potatoes, almost anything that calls for a mild onion flavour.  Although its usually the leaves we eat, the entire plant is edible.  That’s right, even the blossoms and the roots.  Try adding the blossoms as garnish on the plate.  Better yet, eat the blossom with your potato salad.  The black seed which are hidden inside the ripe blossom have a wonderful peppery-oniony taste to sprinkle over top scrambled eggs, potato salad …. the sky’s the limit. 

It is a well accepted garden fact that bees are attracted to the colour purple, so the vibrant purple blossoms of CHIVES is the perfect garden attraction for pollinators. I have my biggest chive plant as a centerpiece in my herb garden, but I also have it in a few other spots throughout the garden among perennial flowers and vegetables.  Grow them in your vegetable garden as a friendly companion. They are great neighbours.

I cut the purple flowers throughout the season to add them to summer bouquets.  My house is full of fresh bouquets from May through October.  Chives are often in them. 

Hint: the black seeds are IN the flower heads.  If you don’t pick them, they’ll ripen – going to seed and drop to the ground. You will get a hundred little baby chives next year – which is alright as you can dig them up to eat the onion like bulbs.  You will also have some to transplant to other areas, and plenty to give to friends.  Cutting the flowers keeps the population under control. 

Growing:

You can start CHIVES from seed, but why would you?  Yes, they’re easy to start indoors in the spring for later planting, but how many plants do you want anyway?  Or you can simply take a ripe flower head from a friend and sprinkle the seed in your summer or fall garden to start themselves next spring.  That’s the way nature does it. 

The most common way is to simply get a division from a friendly neighbour.  Gently loosen the soil around the clump and pull away a smaller clump from the main plant.. The smaller cluster should have at least five to ten bulbs. Transplant this smaller plant into your desired location, or into pots to give away.  Where I live they can’t be overwintered in pots, but you can try bringing them indoors.  If you have a nice sunny window – you can use them all winter long.

Although they’ll grow in almost any soil conditions, CHIVES prefer good fertile well drained garden soil.  As a special treat, work compost into the soil of new plants, or into the top soil around existing plants.  They love the sun and will reward you abundantly if they get lots of it, but if sun is at a premium in your garden, partial shade is alright too. 

Companion Gardening:

CHIVES are your garden’s Best neighbours.  Plant them in your vegetable garden as your first line of defense (along with Marigolds). They repel carrot flies, aphids and cabbage worms (my mortal enemy).  I sprinkle seed among my garden vegetables and let them grow at will.  If there’s a spot I don’t want them for some reason, I’ll pull those up.  Its not like you’re gonna run outta seed when nature keeps you abundantly supplied in those gorgeous round blossoms. 

CHIVES don’t have much for natural enemies.  They say aphids can be a problem sometimes, but I guess I’ve been lucky as its never been a problem for me.  Their strong onion scent seems to deter pests.  In a strawberry bed, their scent screens the sweet smell of the berries, deterring slugs and other pest that are attracted to the sweetness.  Chives adds potassium and calcium to your soil through their dropped leaves, so let them grow, mature and die in your strawberry patch or vegetable garden.  Add any discards to your compost pile, or better yet, leave them as mulch around the plants. Another benefit of growing chives in the strawberry bed is the mulch.

Remember that their purple flowers attract bees which is what you want more of in your strawberry and vegetable gardens.  Pollinators of all kinds will be drawn by the purple flowers. Plant CHIVES among your other herbs, flowers, and among your vegetables especially your tomatoes, carrots and strawberries (yeah I know strawberries are not vegetables). 

Chives in the Kitchen:

I cut a handful of CHIVES with a kitchen knife to bring into the kitchen just before I’m gonna put them on the table.  Actually ‘I’ rarely do.  LOL
Usually, just as I’m putting the final touches on dinner, I ask one of my kids or grandkids to go cut a handful of chives.  Simply grab a handful and cut one or two inches above the soil.  In the kitchen, pull the hard flower stems (put them in water as a cut flower) and brown leaves out and then either chop on a cutting board, or cut with scissors into little pieces about 1/2 centimeter long.  Sprinkle over your mashed potatoes, steamed vegetables, omelettes, salads, potato salad, stir fries, … limitless potential for use in your favourite dishes.

Once in awhile – if you’re not using them often enough, the plant gets too big and straggly with too many flowers going to seed.  If that happens – when that happens, take a serrated kitchen knife and cut the whole thing down about two inches from the ground.  Relax.  It will grow back and give you another chance to stay on top of it.  A good reason to have more than one plant. Sometimes your plant simply needs a little haircut. A gentle trim will do. Just to keep things tidy.

GARLIC CHIVES

Also known as Chinese leeks, garlic chives grow in the same areas of the garden as regular chives, and most of the information is completely transferable.  The leaves are a little larger, longer and flat.  The flowers are bigger than chive flowers, but more flat than globular.  They attract pollinators and other beneficial insects.  Full sun is best. 

As with chives, the entire plant is edible, the roots are especially ‘garlicky’.  The flavour has a distinct garlic overtone to the ‘oniony’ taste you’re already familiar with in chives.   Use when you want that extra punch that garlic offers, like in soups, sauces, omelettes, and in all Asian dishes. 

I’d love to hear all about your CHIVE story.
How do you grow them and where?
What are your favourite ways to use them?
Any tips for the rest of us?

Warmly,

Cindy Suelzle

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Feverfew – the garden herb you should know

FEVERFEW is a biannual herb that grows very prolifically in our region – Edmonton, Alberta.  Bushy, ferny even. Drought resistant, will grow well in full or diffused sun. Very hardy.

By the end of June, you’ll get profuse amounts of compact little gorgeous daisy like flowers that are perfect for fresh bouquets in the kitchen. Don’t pick them all though because it self seeds. I always have dozens growing throughout my garden so I am in no danger (anymore) of not having some come back next year – no matter how many I cut for bouquets.

 

Using FEVERFEW 

Feverfew leaves are used to treat migraines and lesser headaches. You simply pick the leaves and eat them in which ever way you find most suitable. They can be chopped up and put in salad or a sandwich.  They have a bitter taste so best to disguise them by eating with something else. They say that a few leaves daily is sufficient as a preventative.  

I got my first plants from my mother in law more than 20 years ago. She made a point to eat a few fresh leaves every day and was convinced it helped manage her migraines.  That is what interested me initially in Feverfew, and I subsequently did quite a bit of reading about it over the years.  I noted when I worked in a health food store that many people purchased feverfew for headaches and they swore it made all the difference.  It is not a pain killer.  It is a ‘preventative’.  When asking many customers how it helped them, they would universally tell me that by taking a small amount every single day, their migraines were less frequent and much more manageable when they did come.  That sounded pretty wonderful to me.  There is also compelling evidence that feverfew is helpful for menstrual cramps. 

Personally, I am not prone to headaches.  Good thing, because I have a very low tolerance for them.  Lucky me I haven’t had a headache in years and I have never had a migraine in my life, but I like the idea of growing an herb that has so much respect medicinally.  Since I have some members of my family who are prone to migraines I decided years ago that I would always have some in my garden.  If you are not able to grow your own feverfew, you can buy it in your favourite health food store, or if you grow it, but want some during the winter, dry it and either make it into a tea (with some pleasant tasting mint because it doesn’t have a great taste itself), or powder it and put into capsules to swallow.  Be smart about quantity.  One should do it.  

The ferny bushy plant flowers pretty much all summer long!  Because it is a biennial – meaning it grows for only two years, going to seed the second year in late summer, I allow some flowers to ‘ripen’ and go to seed.   I then take the seed and sprinkle them generously throughout my flower garden and herb garden.  They come up profusely and I simply pull what I don’t want.  After all, a weed is only “a plant growing where it doesn’t belong“.   If you don’t let the plant go to seed, or then sprinkle the seeds around, you may find yourself with none the next year as I did.   A mistake I only made once. 

It deserves an honoured place in my garden, and it is a pleasant bonus for me that the flowers are so pretty.  I highly recommend growing feverfew in your herb or flower garden.  At the very least, it will be a pretty little flower.  And if you’re prone to migraines it has the potential to become your best friend.  

Total Win / Win 

I’d love to hear your experience with Feverfew. 

Warmly,

Cindy Suelzle

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the importance of setting goals

I love the quote by Bill Copeland “the trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score“. This is a perfect visual image for me and I think it speaks volumes. Especially, as it seems, though goal setting is encouraged on every corner, in every area of life – educational goals, workplace or business goals, family and household goals, goals in gospel living – it has almost become too ‘common’ a term.  And because of that, many of us miss the point.  So what is the point of playing the game if all you do is run up and down the field kicking the ball?  Eternal ‘practice‘?  For what? Goal setting is MORE than a worthwhile endeavour, it is absolutely necessary to becoming the person we would like to become.

The truth is, without goals we will spend our lives either spinning our wheels in one spot, or aimlessly adrift being influenced by every wind. The key is to set attainable goals that are meaningful.

Whether they are long term all encompassing goals like getting out of debt, short term easier goals like getting on the treadmill five times a week, or even eternal goals of living with our families forever, the act of setting goals propels us forward. A ship leaving the harbour with no goal or destination? Preposterous. Throwing a dart without a target? For what purpose? And yet, we are no different when we allow ourselves to go through the whole day, a whole week, month or year without purpose, without visualization of a hoped for destination. A GOAL. Whatever talent and abilities we might possess, whatever potential is ours – without focus and directed energy, they will never amount to anything.

I like to look at the idea of LEGACY. Defined, legacy is anything “handed down” (be it good or bad), but for my purpose here, I am speaking specifically about what we as a person are remembered for after we’re gone.  Its humbling to acknowledge that we have a lot of control over the legacy we leave behind. For the most part, what it will be is our choice.  Imagine that.  We create a good legacy through effort and energy, or we let our legacy default into meaningless. Again our choice. So ask yourself these three questions:
1) Where do you want to be in a year? five years? twenty years?
2) What is important to you?
3) What do you want to be remembered for?  What legacy do you want to leave behind?

Whether we realize it or not – whether we actually use the words “goal setting” or not, most of us DO set goals for ourselves.  I have some suggestions for ways we can make them more meaningful, and have a more empowering influence in our lives.

1. Goals give us Direction and propel us forward

Setting a goal provides a destination to work toward.  When you set a goal you naturally direct your attention toward the first step in achieving it. Focusing on it leads your thoughts in a certain direction, and what you think about becomes behaviour.

2. Goals keep us on the path. 

You can not walk a straight line without a fixed point to follow. When you have a goal in mind – a particular destination, you will focus on it, and you will be more inclined to avoid detours that would distract you from reaching it. The more specific your goals are, the more likely your path will be straighter and more direct.  For example, it has been a life long goal of mine to eat healthily.  Generally I do pretty good, but the goal itself is unspecific.  In the last few years, my goal has been to be ‘smarter’ about my choices.  Still very unspecific.  So recently I committed to avoid sugar for one month. This is specific, and measurable (see point #3), and very relevant to me. A clear and relevant goal sets you on a path and provides incentive to make the sacrifices necessary to achieve it.  There are always sacrifices involved in reaching a goal, because the nature of obtaining a desired outcome requires changing established behaviour. And that is never easy. Desirable maybe, but not easy.

3. Goals must be measurable to be of any value

By setting a worthwhile but immeasurable goal of “being a better person” or having a “successful business”, we never really know when or if we achieved it. We need to know where we are right now, and compare it to a fixed destination. Our goal should be “measurable“.  A big goal to “get out of debt”, broken into smaller goals of paying off the credit cards, the student loan, the car loan, setting a minimum dollar amount aside for unexpected expenses and to eventually replace the car so you don’t take on another debt, are all manageable, measurable, and as you achieve each step you have reason to celebrate.  A big goal of getting in a year’s supply of food storage, broken down into smaller goals of buying for one week ahead, one month ahead, and finally three months ahead, are all steps along the way, and are attainable. And measurable. And worth celebrating. The specificity of my goal to avoid sugar for ONE MONTH made it measurable and therefore attainable. I could see the end of the month from the beginning, the light at the end of the tunnel so to speak. It was a mental exercise that made it easy to track success with every accomplishment. You cannot manage what you cannot measure. And you cannot improve what you cannot manage. (*1)

4. There must be flexibility in resetting your compass when working to achieve goals

Without compromising the end goal, you can be patient with yourself when you fall off the wagon briefly from time to time. Simply get back on. You are still better for being on the path, and it has been my observation that though our heart can change on a dime, behaviour sometimes takes time to follow, especially when you are dealing with a full out change of established habits and routine.

One of my favourite quotes is from Maya Angelou.  She says simply “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, DO BETTER.” How very simple and yet profound such a statement is.  It gives me permission to be patient with myself when I know that I am doing the best I can – on my path to do better.  It steers me away from the temptation to beat myself up over former short comings, and to always move forward reaching for a new bar of excellence. It is motivating by not being unrealistically rigid.

5.  Goals provide accountability – especially when written down

When your goal is specific, with a start date and an end in sight – you make yourself accountable to both. By writing it down, you have more accountability.  A goal not written down is just a wish.  By placing it where we will see it often, it can be a constant reminder, providing even more accountability. And of course sharing that goal with another, or within a safe support group – strengthens that accountability more yet. The combination of all the above, creates the best formula for success. Do NOT allow yourself to procrastinate by giving yourself loopholes.  Remember, “the Best time to do better was yesterday. But the second best time is RIGHT NOW.”  Be firm.  Don’t let yourself off the hook with all your favourite excuses for not changing.

6. Goals provide motivation, and help us believe in ourselves

Setting achievable, measurable goals transforms mountainous challenges into manageable hills. Visualizing the end result provides the incentive to keep working toward it.  Without setting actual goals, be honest with yourself, you’re just dreaming. Providing yourself with the accountability of writing your goal down and sharing it, is excellent motivation to move forward. Having a clear, compelling goal motivates you toward behaviour that will help you reach it. The goal to pay off a specific debt is clear and concise. It is easy to understand. It is measurable. Visualizing it and what it can mean for you and your future from that point on provides the motivation necessary to make it a reality.  Fixing your focus on the end result, and being mindful of your continual changing behaviour along your path gives you continual feedback by which to measure your success. Success breeds more success, and a constant motivation to move forward.  It isn’t simply about creating a plan, it is also about providing the inspiration and incentive to aim for and accomplish great things.  Without making that goal and working everyday to achieve it, how would you ever expect to attain any level of accomplishment?  When you actually SEE yourself making progress your dreams suddenly become attainable and your motivation increases. Newton’s basic law of physics remains true in all areas of life. “An object that is at rest will stay at rest unless a force acts upon it. An object that is in motion will not change its velocity unless a force acts upon it.”  Once an object is moving, it is infinitely easier to keep it moving than to try to get it moving again once it has come to a stand still.  And the same principle applies in our journey toward a specific goal. 

7.  Reaching a Goal should be celebrated as the accomplishment it is!

Seeing progress is addicting. It is invigorating and it sustains momentum.  On the path to being debt free are many accomplishments. When you pay off a specific credit card debt (job well done bytheway), you have every reason to rejoice in your progress toward your ultimate goal. On your way to losing twenty pounds, you have every reason to rejoice in losing five pounds, and every other success along the way.  Don’t underestimate the mental stimulation of celebrating smaller successes on your way to large ones.  Achieving goals builds character.  And that is something to celebrate. 

Zig Zigler once said, “If you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time.”  Of this I think we can be assured. We can never be happy with merely putting in our time till life is over.  As children of God, we are simply not wired that way.  What we can accomplish by deliberately aiming ourselves toward something meaningful that is in harmony with those things that are most important to us – is absolutely limitless. Remember that what we get by achieving our goals is nothing compared to what we ‘become’ by achieving them.   

Warmly,


Cindy Suelzle

footnote:
*1
I have no idea where that quote comes from, or who may have originally said it, or I’d be happy to give them proper credit. If if was you – thanks

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Provident Living and Self Reliance

November 18 of this year was a Sunday.  We woke up to an unusually cold house.  It didn’t take a rocket scientist to confirm that our stupid furnace wasn’t working.  In fact, we suspected it stopped working the day before. In November in Edmonton, you don’t get along for too long without a furnace!

You may have experienced something similar.  If a furnace is gonna quit, its gonna do it in the winter time when its working steady. I know lots of others have had this very thing happen.  It may not be common, but it is not rare.  It was SO not in our plan for that cold November Sunday. The problem is, these kinds of things never ARE in the plan.  Who schedules the furnace quitting into your weekly calendar?  But planning for these kinds of possibilities makes all the difference in how you get through them. 

Provident Living
We could spend hours talking about the different facets of it. But cutting to the quick, being “provident” means having foresight and providing carefully for the future.  Its about taking care of yourself today AND tomorrow, and being prepared for the unexpected.  And it IS God’s temporal plan for His children.

Many years ago, Dan’s uncle was selling his motorhome. It was a nice one and he had taken exceptionally good care of it, and Dan really thought we should have it. He spent considerable time trying to talk me into it, and finally convinced me. Sort of. Mostly, I just gave in.  Then one day he came home from a session of General Conference and said “We’re not buying Uncle Ernie’s motorhome.” 
I was just starting to warm up to the idea. LOL

It was October 1998. President Gordon B. Hinckley had just told those attending a general session for the men of the church to GET OUT OF DEBT.  “I am suggesting” he said ” that the time has come to get our houses in order …  Self-reliance cannot obtain when there is serious debt hanging over a household. One has neither independence nor freedom from bondage when he is obligated to others.” He went on to say “I urge you brethren, to look to the condition of your finances. I urge you to be modest in your expenditures; discipline yourselves in your purchase to avoid debt to the extent possible.  Pay off debt as quickly as you can, and free yourselves from bondage. This is part of the temporal gospel in which we believe.”  He concluded his remarks with this “If you have paid your debts, if you have a reserve, even though it be small, then should storms howl about your head, you will have shelter for your wives and children and peace in your hearts.” 1

It wasn’t that we hadn’t heard the counsel to stay out of debt before. In fact, we felt strongly about it, and even tried to live it.  But that particular talk became one of those defining teaching events in our lives. It spoke to Dan’s heart and when we discussed it, it spoke to my heart.  It changed things for us. We recommitted ourselves and began working with intent toward becoming completely free of debt. 

Three years later, Dan lost his job. A job we had every expectation that he would retire from.  “Downsized” was a relatively new word at the time, but people were getting used to it.  One day he went to work as usual, and a few hours later he was home.  And that was that.  The truth is, nothing ever went back to ‘normal’ after that day. We owe a LOT to our strict obedience – finally – to the emphatic admonishment President Hinckley gave that evening three years before.  When a prophet speaks that forthrightly, that emphatically, and that urgently – it is a good idea to pay attention. I am so glad we did.

When we had a family meeting a few days later, to tell our kids that Dad no longer had a job, there was silence for a long time.  Jacob was just home from his mission, and he asked the questions everyone wondered. “What does this mean? How is this going to affect us in the day to day?”  Of course these were questions we had talked about ourselves before we met with the kids. We could tell them this: “Because we listened to, and obeyed the prophet’s counsel to get out of debt, we believe we will ride this out without too much pain. Our most important goal is to keep this house. It is the only thing we owe money on, and every energy must  be spent on making sure this house is never in danger.”

Things didn’t work out the way we hoped they would.  Dan never re-entered his field. After months of looking, he re-entered the workforce taking a job paying $12 an hour.  We had plenty of opportunity to reinforce our testimony to our kids of some very important principles. Like TITHING, FOOD STORAGE, and living within our means – which means avoiding DEBT. 

I could not even begin to count the number of times I shook my head and said to myself, or to Dan, or to whatever kid happened to be standing nearby “Wow. Can you imagine?  If we had had credit card debt, we would have lost this house by now!  Who knew this would go on as long as it has?” 

Provident living and being self reliant are not just Latter-day Saint ideals.  It is a very popular concept among all sorts of people who focus on independence.  However, there are a few things that I think are important to keep in mind when talking about Provident Living in a Latter-day Saint context.  And as with all important things, we get our most reliable tutoring from the scriptures.

So where in the scriptures does it tell us to prepare for the furnace to quit, or to get a food storage in, or to stay out of debt, or put some money aside in case the unexpected happens?

Well, we know that when the Lord speaks thru his prophets, that is scripture to us. Almost 60 years before President Hinckley gave that talk, (in 1941) President Heber J Grant spoke from the pulpit “If there is any one thing that will bring peace and contentment into the human heart, and into the family,” he said “it is to live within our means. And if there is any one thing that is grinding and discouraging and disheartening, it is to have debts and obligations that one cannot meet.” 2

In the Doctrine & Covenants we read “… verily I say unto you that all things unto me are spiritual, and not at any time have I given unto you a law which was temporal; neither any man, nor the children of men; neither Adam your father, whom I created.
Behold I gave unto him that he should be an agent unto himself; and I gave unto him commandment, but no temporal commandment gave I unto him, for my commandments are spiritual; they are not natural nor temporal …” (DC 29: 34,35)

For the 72 hours we were without a furnace last November, we were surprisingly comfortable. We were sure glad it wasn’t 37 below, but there were other things that made that easier for us.  Being prepared for possibilities can take a near tragedy and make it nothing more than an inconvenience.  And not being prepared can take an inconvenience and turn it into a tragedy. We had always worried about what we would do if we lost heat in the winter.  That was the worst case scenario in our stay-at-home emergency plan. So over time, as we could afford it, we worked toward some solutions.

  • many years ago we spent considerable energy re-insulating our attic. We’ve noticed that it has made a big difference in our house retaining heat in the winter, and cool in the summer.
  • we have a gas fireplace which we turned on immediately.
  • we have a woodstove downstairs with a flat top for cooking if necessary
  • we have a few cords of wood stacked up outside, some of it by the back door, and some of it downstairs beside the wood stove
  • we’ve had some bad experiences learning to light that stupid stove when it was 30 below. We’ve smoked out the whole house that not only set off the smoke alarm, but took weeks to get rid of.
  • we had some money set aside for emergencies that we were able to use to fix the furnace

All these things we used on that Sunday and Monday.  By Tuesday morning, it was as if nothing had ever happened, except that our house smelled slightly of wood smoke.

We were so grateful for planning ahead for a possibility we hoped would never happen. And who knows? That might have just been a test run. I hope not.  

Provident Living and being Self Reliant means that we learn skills that will help our family should the unexpected rear its ugly head.  Knowing those skills takes the fear out of the unexpected.  Years ago – before I made my first long distance road trip without Dan, he thought it prudent to teach me how to change a tire. I admit, it wasn’t my finest moment. To say I was resistant would be giving me too much credit. I had absolutely no desire, but he insisted.  He made me come out and watch him as he patiently explained each step while he removed a tire, and put it back on. I stood behind him watching and noticed how dirty his hands were getting and I thought “You canNOT be serious! I am not touching that. And what if I break a nail? That’s a risk I’m not willing to take.”  I didn’t vocalize any of those thoughts and wisely Dan didn’t insist I actually demonstrate all I learned. 

I have since learned to change a tire. I use a CELL PHONE. The way I look at it – I have five sons and a husband. And I didn’t put up with all those boys for 40 years for nothing! Problem is, I got a flat tire in Montana, when I was far from any of those boys. And far from AMA, and in a dead zone for cell coverage. My very pregnant, but smarter niece was with me. Guess who changed the tire? Another one of my un-finer moments.

  • If you drive, the likelihood of you having a flat tire is extremely high. In fact, I’d venture to say its inevitable. Just a matter of time.  Its part of driving. 
  • If you live in Canada, the likelihood of you having a furnace issue one day is real. Even high.
  • You may have some unexpected and unusually high bills one day – that knock the wind out of you.
  • One day you may find yourself unemployed.

None of these things have to destroy you. Every one of them can be dealt with better and more smoothly with a little bit of foresight and providence.

Sit as a family and review some possibilities. And then talk out possible solutions.

  • What would we do if we lost heat in the middle of winter? How would we get thru the first few hours? What if it went on for a few days?  
  • What would we do if Dad suddenly couldn’t go to work? What is our plan to get thru the first few weeks? What if it went on for six months? What if he never worked again?
  • What skills should we learn to make our life more comfortable if things suddenly changed?
  • What if we had to cut our grocery budget in half?
  • What if we had a few bad months when we had zero money after the bills to buy groceries at all?  

During some very lean years, it never occurred to me for a minute to say “Wow, wasn’t that lucky that we happened to have a food storage downstairs?”  

When Dan lost his job, it never occurred to me for one minute to think “Wow, wasn’t that lucky that we decided several years ago to get out of, and then forever after avoid debt?”

Luck had no part in any of that. They were both results of obedience to the counsel a loving Heavenly Father – given for our comfort and peace of mind.

Some things to put on your list:

  • FOOD STORAGE: Get one!  If you’ve got one, keep it up. I have heard too many older people say something like “Now that the kids are gone, there’s not much point. I don’t bother with it anymore.” Are you kidding me? Did you suddenly stop eating? Who’s supposed to feed you?
  • DEBT:  Get OUT! Out Out Out. Avoid it like it is the plague it is. If you cannot pay for it by the end of this month, you cannot afford it.
This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is meme-we-cant-afford-it.jpg

Wait for it. Save for it. But do NOT “buy it on time”! There are very few necessary exceptions. Obviously we have to borrow for a house. Sometimes one has to borrow for a reliable vehicle. (be reasonable. Affordability is still key here.) Sometimes one has to borrow for an education. But make paying those debts off a priority, starting with the smallest one first.

You can say “We cannot afford this.” Try it. Its not as hard as you might think it is. Just form the words: “We. Can’t. Afford. It.” See? not that bad. Use that sentence more. If you cannot pay it off by the end of this month – you CAN. NOT. AFFORD. IT! Stop feeling ‘less than‘ because you don’t have all that someone else has. Perhaps they can’t afford it either, but they’ve unwisely chosen debt to make it look like they can. Come ON. Those are mind games we play with ourselves, and ultimately we’re the losers. Stop feeling that you deserve this or that. I’ll tell you what you deserve. You deserve peace of mind. And you’re never gonna have it, no matter how nice your truck is – as long as you owe money.

I do not speak against nice vehicles. I don’t speak against nice vacations. Or leather furniture. If you can afford it, do whatever your little heart desires. But remember – if you can’t pay for it by the end of the month – you cannot afford it. Live with that. And man up to it. Live within your means and be grateful for all you DO have, instead of counting all the things you don’t.

EMERGENCY SAVINGS:    If you can only put $5 a week away, then put $5 a week away.  But do something. The Lord blesses us when we obey. We don’t have to do great things. Small things count in His eyes, and the Lord blesses us for them.

When referring to the story of Nephi finding ore to build tools necessary to build a ship, L. Tom Perry said “I have sometimes wondered what would have happened if Nephi had asked the Lord for tools instead of a place to find the ore to make tools. I doubt the Lord would have honored Nephi’s request. You see, the Lord knew that Nephi could make the tools, and it is seldom the Lord will do something for us that we can do for ourselves. The Lord does help when we go to Him in times of need, especially when we are committed to His work and respond to His will. But the Lord only helps those who are willing to help themselves. He expects His children to be self-reliant to the degree they can be.”

Elder Perry went on to say “Independence and self-reliance are critical to our spiritual and temporal growth. . . . . If we increase our dependence on anything or anyone except the Lord, we will find an immediate decrease in our freedom to act.”  3 (GC October 1991) 

We all could go on and on and on – giving examples and bearing testimony of how living the principles of Providence and Self Reliance has helped us and how they put us in a position of being able to be more charitable. And we could be uplifted and edified by it all.  And I think we should have those discussions.  In this article, we could only skim over the basics of such an all encompassing gospel lifestyle. And make no mistake, that is exactly what it is. A lifestyle. Learning skills that will help us be self reliant is a life long focus. It is a lifestyle. And it yields gratitude and peace of mind.

I encourage us all to look again at our our situations – no matter where we are on the spectrum, and find a way to do better. Make it your goal this year to become more self reliant and work toward that goal every single day.

The Lord will help us, but remember what Elder Perry said, He will “help those who are willing to help themselves. He EXPECTS [us] to be self reliant to the degree that [we] can be.”

Two more scriptures to leave you with.  I find them very motivating when I recommit myself to follow counsel from the Brethren “Why call me Lord, Lord and do not the things which I say?” (Luke 6:46)

“I the Lord am bound when ye do what I say, but when you do not what I say, ye have no promise.” (DC 82:10) I cannot think of anyone I would rather have bound to me, than Him.  And He promises. He says “I the Lord am BOUND when ye do what I say.” It is my prayer that we will all willingly “Bind” Him to us as we strive to live what He says. As we strive to live providently, and to know the peace and freedom of a self reliant life.

Warmly,


Cindy Suelzle

footnotes:

  1. General Conference October 1998, Priesthood Session – To the Boys and to the Men. https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1998/10/to-the-boys-and-to-the-men?lang=eng
  2. Heber J. Grant, Relief Society Magazine May 1932, https://www.lds.org/ensign/2001/10/latter-day-prophets-speak-strengthening-the-home?lang=eng
  3. L. Tom Perry, October General Conference 1991 https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1991/10/becoming-self-reliant?lang=eng
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to Santa or not to Santa

…… that is a question every parent must come to terms with at some point early in their parenting. (part 1 of “to Santa or not to Santa”)

And its not a question to be taken lightly, because whatever you decide, it isn’t your right to wreck it for others’ who may choose a different path. For me, in our very first year of parenting it could be avoided. We had the only grandchildren on both sides, so the precedent hadn’t been established. We in fact, unintentionally – had the responsibility for establishing a precedent in both of our families. A place of considerable pressure for someone as young and idealistic as we were.

The dilemma I felt was that I wanted our children to love the Saviour and to recognize that Christmas was first and foremost about celebrating His birth, and to acknowledging the important part He played in our life. I felt that a celebration the magnitude of Christmas, could be justified just as well with or without Santa Claus. But on the other hand, I had many fond memories of Santa and didn’t want to deny my kids the wholesome magic that he brings with him. But still, Santa had overshadowed any feeling I might have had as a child for the Saviour. In fact in my early childhood, I had no knowledge of the birth of Jesus and its connection to Christmas. Nativities were not a part of our Christmas. Truth be told, I don’t believe they were a part of very many people’s Christmas in those days. I never saw one when I was a child, or a youth.

I successfully dodged that bullet for a few years, while our extended families, the grandparents and aunts and uncles stood a respectful distance away from Santa while allowing us the privilege of making that decision. Christmas of 1982 was the year I needed to jump off the fence and make a decision. Jacob was four and a half years old. Sarah was three and a half. They were going to have memories of this Christmas and it was time for me to make the choice: Was Santa going to be a part of our Christmas or not? The problem was, that I didn’t have a crystal ball and couldn’t tell how inviting Santa into our lives would impact our family long term. Dan wanted Santa. Our folks all wanted Santa. All our kids’ aunts and uncles wanted Santa. . . . . And there were other issues to consider. Like how to introduce him at this point?

Finally, I hit upon a plan. I discussed it with Dan and we had an important family council with our kids. It was time. We told them about the old man who lived at the north pole, who loved children. His delight in life we told them was to make children happy, and because of that, he spent his whole year building toys for them which he gave to them once a year on Christmas Eve. We held nothing back. We laid out for them the whole picture. The red suit and beard, the sleigh and reindeer, the elves, the list, …. everything. They were spell bound, wide eyed and enthralled. We told them that there was only one thing Santa loved more than children. He loved Jesus Christ. And he celebrated the birth of Jesus Christ by giving gifts and spreading good cheer because it made him so happy to do so, BUT his one fear and worry, was that children would get so excited about him and the presents, that they would forget about the “reason for the season” – the celebration of the birth of our Saviour.

His commitment was that if that happened in any house he normally visited, he would simply stop coming to that house. As long as the children remembered Jesus, and were grateful for Santa’s gifts then he would come every year for their whole lives. But if the children got too caught up in Santa and thought that Christmas was all about him and not about Jesus, he would stop coming to them. Of course, he might depend on us as parents to let him know how that was going. We told our kids that Dad and I thought they were big enough for us to invite Santa for Christmas – if of course, they wanted him to come. You won’t be surprised to know that they very much wanted him to come! And they promised that they would always remember the reason we celebrated Christmas, which was also the reason Santa did all his wonderful stuff.

The Spirit of Christmas by Greg Olson

That was it then. We officially invited Santa Claus into our Christmas the year of 1982. We were expecting our third child the next spring. It was time we moved on. I had some trepidation, but I was determined to monitor our Santa-meter and keep our Christmases in balance.

As it would happen, Santa Claus happened to be visiting our local shopping mall that Saturday and I asked the kids if they’d like to go see him. They had never seen him – or any likenesses of him, before then. It is wonderful, the control a parent has over the influence the world has on a four year old. Don’t we all wish we could protect them for a life time with the same care and attention we could when they were toddlers? We controlled what they saw on television, what they read and what they saw of the world. And until we were ready, I prevented any exposure they had to Santa Claus. We made preparations to go the very next day to see him.

As we stood in a long line of excited children, (another new experience for Jacob and Sarah, as I normally avoided crowds and malls) – I noted that Santa was asking kids what they wanted for Christmas. Yikes. I forgot about that important detail. Our kids did not know they could make gift requests. I coached them “Santa Claus may ask you what you want for Christmas. If he does, Jacob why don’t you tell him you’d like a covered wagon made out of wood with horses?”
“Okay!” he readily agreed.
“Sarah, how bout you ask him for a princess dress?”
“Okay!” she joined.
Whew. That wasn’t so hard. We got closer and Jacob and Sarah were very observant of all that was going on around them. I too watched the minutes unfold – this truly was a departure point for our little family, at least where the kind old man of Christmas was concerned. My kids were getting big enough that it was time for me to let some of the world into their lives – while I could still control the circumstances.

Finally, we were at the front of the line. Santa invited them to come near to him. I accompanied. He asked them if they had been good children. They assured him they had. As predicted, he asked them what they would like for Christmas. Jacob announced that he would like a toy covered wagon drawn by horses. Sarah told him she would like a princess dress (which bytheway, in 1982 was not the Disney princess dresses we’re so familiar with nowadays). Santa nodded and made mental note, then asked “What else would you like?”
Oops. I hadn’t anticipated that one.
“We don’t know.” Jacob confided “Our mom didn’t tell us that one yet.”
Whew. Quick thinking Son. We said our good byes and received candy canes for our visit. Dad happily waited on the other side to hear about our experience.

It was a happy day for him and the kids. A bit traumatic for me, but happy nonetheless. Our family was growing up. And we had just taken a big step into a new world that could never be reversed. A tangible innocence was traded in that day, for another circumstance – another innocence that would carry us for several more years until our children were ready to make another transition: a coming-of-age discovery that Santa Claus would play a big part in. In fact, he was here to stay the rest of their lives – in one form or another.

(this is part 1 of our Santa story)  
I’d love to hear about how you made that important choice of inviting (or not inviting) Santa into your family’s lives.

Warmly,

Cindy Suelzle